Having the title of bestie, BFF, best babe or _____ (insert super cute name here) is not something to take lightly. There's a lot of responsibility that comes with being a best friend, but sometimes we take it for granted. Our #SquadGoals series is all about helping you make the most of your friendships. So today, let's brush up on our skills on how to be a better bestie to the main chicks in our lives.
1. COMPARISON, it's a slippery slope to jealousy.
That unspoken rule that "she's not allowed to have other friends" is sooo junior high. Let's nip this one in the bud. It's totally okay for your BFF to have another bestie. Just because she enjoys time with her doesn't mean she doesn't like hangin' with you. Comparison it a slippery slope to jealousy + robs you of the opportunity to truly get to know them. Sure, we've all had that crazy friend moment when you see the cute "usies" or the Snapchat adventures (minus you) + feel super annoyed. But relax girl, they are not you + you are not them. There's a reason she has both of you in her life.
Challenge: Plan a girls night out with your BFF + her friend(s). Make an effort to get to know her other besties on a personal level. Who knows, you might actually really like em'.
2. WALK IN when they walk out.
Ever have a crazy time in your life when you feel like everything is just falling apart? In those moments you need your best babe more than ever. And when all hell is breaking loose in her life, best believe she's gonna need someone to help her make it through. Regardless if others walk out on her, stick it out + hang in there. She needs to know she's not in this fight alone. So make time for your girl, especially during those hard times.
Challenge: When life gets rough for your friends, make yourself available for whatever they may need. And of course, keep your word.
3. Listen to Understand, Not to Reply
I am totally guilty of having squirrel brain, so I tend to interrupt my friends when they're talking to get my advice out before I forget. But I've realized I end up missing half of what my friend is actually saying because I'm so focused on what my response is gonna be. If this is you, don't worry girl, I know the struggle. But there's an easy fix to this: SHUT UP + JUST LISTEN. Sometimes, silence is better than a thousand empty words, and most of the time, your bestie just needs someone to listen + understand her.
Challenge: It can be hard, but to prevent blurting out what you wanna say, try keeping your mouth shut (literally) until there's an opportune time for you to say your piece.
4. Be Honest, Even if It Hurts
We have a motto in our family: I'd rather tell you the truth + lose you than lie + keep you. Honestly, speaking the truth can sometimes hurt, which is why you should wrap it up in a pretty lil' package + deliver it in love. We've all had that moment when your BFF is wearing an...ummm...unique outfit or hairstyle, and you wanna yell, "UGH, have you lost your mind?!" But i'm sure there's a better way to keep it real with your BFF than totally making her feel hideous. Speak it in love!
Challenge: Sometimes, it's not what you say, but how you say it. Think before you speak + do your best to not talk to her in a judgmental tone.
5. FORGIVE, always
We're not perfect! We all make mistakes + we all deserve a lil' bit of grace now + then. Nelson Mandela said it best:
Offer grace like free refills. 'Cause we promise you'll need it one day too!
Challenge: If your friend offends you, bite the bullet + have the maturity to talk about it. Once you both hash things out, let it go + move on; don't keep a running record of wrongs.
Can I still say that? Is that still a thing? Welp, though the phrase is played out, it actually does prove a great point. You only have one life to live on this earth, so make it count + enjoy every day you have with your BFF. When I was younger, I missed out on awesome opportunities because I was too scared of what people would think of me + how I looked. I missed great opportunities for lifelong memories. Life is way too short to care what people think. Be fun, be free, + go on adventures with your friends!
Challenge: Make a bucket list of fun stuff that you + your friends want to try. Push past your fears + get daring. I promise you won't regret it.
7. LOVE + DREAM Like Crazy
Love the crap outta her through it all–the good, the bad + the ugly cries. It's so refreshing to have a bestie you can be your true self around with no judgement. And, there's also no one better to dream with than you best babe. Share your most valued dreams + aspirations with each other and hold one other accountable to achieve those goals. Be her biggest cheerleader. Allow your friendship to grow into an example of light, love + sisterhood.
Challenge: Don't be afraid to be your quirky self. And strike up a convo about your crazy, wild dreams + what practical ways you can help one another succeed.
Which of these tips stuck out to you the most? In what areas could you use some improvement in your friendships? Tell us your thoughts in the comments below!